So my parents left Hong Kong on Monday, after almost four months with us, day in and day out. Their departure also coincided nearly exactly with my return to work full time. Lola's activities have all restarted or are about to restart, so she is out of the apartment a lot more.
Suddenly, our lives have taken a turn for the quiet. Without my parents, with me out of the house all day, with Lola out of the house every morning and on some afternoons, and with Michael keeping tough work hours, our apartment suddenly feels so empty.
I have been back at work for nearly a week now. It has been okay so far, until I allow myself to think about the fragile balance of everything - then I feel a consuming kind of panic. I am trying to go easy on myself but it is easier said than done. It seems to take unfathomable amounts of energy and deep reserves of optimism to maintain pace of life with so many little kids. Just last night we dealt with Lola waking up at 4:30 am, throwing a massive temper tantrum, and waking up the boys. I had also just woken up at 1:30 am to pump, and ended up getting up at 6am for the day. It's no wonder I had passed out at 8 pm - and in retrospect, thank goodness I had!
What has probably been the hardest for me, mentally and emotionally, is the very little amount of time I am now getting with the boys. I had very little time during my leave anyway, but now with my being out of the house for most of the day, my time with the boys probably does not even come to an hour in a day. When I'm at work from 9 to 7 as I was today, my only realistic time with them is in the early hours of the morning - whatever time they are awake from 5 to 8 am. And let's be honest - those are hours where I am desperate for just a little more sleep. Plus, that's time I am splitting three ways between the boys and Lola. I try to limit the number of days that I have where I am out of the house that early and home so late, but it happens sometimes. I suppose I should not be complaining given they are sleeping like champs between the hours of approximately 7 to 8 pm and 4 to 5 am, but...I am sad. I miss them.
Lola is as precious as ever, however, and Al and Teo, only 5 days away from hitting 6 months, are unbelievably sweet and adorable. Without my parents around, we no longer have anyone diligently and lovingly taking pictures and videos of the kids every day. This may be the last good picture post in a long time, alas.
There has been a lot of tummy time around these parts, in large part as we try to encourage Al to build up his strength and fix his neck.
I can't say he's always happy about it though...
On one of the last weekdays that my parents were still here (last Thursday), they went to Maggie and Rose together. As you can see, the boys are nearly the size of Lola now.
The boys steadily love eating and playing. They also love books and flip the pages of the little board books like they really are reading.
Here are some outtakes from our photography shoot this weekend. I hope the professional was able to capture some better shots, because I have to tell you, it was pretty much barely-controlled (and at times completely uncontrolled) chaos.
We took my parents out to a fancy steak dinner at McKay's on Saturday night. My dad and I had flank steak, Michael had a wagyu beef tasting, my mom had a sea urchin linguine. We enjoyed a lovely bottle of malbec from Mendoza, and truffle fries and mac and cheese. It was really nice.
My dad had a nice father's day video chat with my sister, who got to see her super handsome and charming (if I may say) nephews. But seriously, look at these expressions!
And look at these expressions as they both catch sight of their food!
My dad managed to catch the eclipse on Sunday, while we were on our way to the pool at the club. Lola, being as observant and precocious as she is, immediately noticed when the sky got very dark and asked where the sun went. When we explained the eclipse to her, she was full of wonder and questions. You could just see the wheels in her brain turning as she tried to understand how it all worked.
Here we are at the pool. Because we couldn't get the boys' naptimes synchronized, we brought Teo this time, figuring we will bring Al next time. Teo handled his first time in the water remarkably well. He cried a bit in shock when Michael thrust his bottom half into the water right away, but then was fine when we eased him in slowly.
Finally, a picture of Al today as he stood on his own, with the help of just the couch! He is so strong.
Suddenly, our lives have taken a turn for the quiet. Without my parents, with me out of the house all day, with Lola out of the house every morning and on some afternoons, and with Michael keeping tough work hours, our apartment suddenly feels so empty.
I have been back at work for nearly a week now. It has been okay so far, until I allow myself to think about the fragile balance of everything - then I feel a consuming kind of panic. I am trying to go easy on myself but it is easier said than done. It seems to take unfathomable amounts of energy and deep reserves of optimism to maintain pace of life with so many little kids. Just last night we dealt with Lola waking up at 4:30 am, throwing a massive temper tantrum, and waking up the boys. I had also just woken up at 1:30 am to pump, and ended up getting up at 6am for the day. It's no wonder I had passed out at 8 pm - and in retrospect, thank goodness I had!
What has probably been the hardest for me, mentally and emotionally, is the very little amount of time I am now getting with the boys. I had very little time during my leave anyway, but now with my being out of the house for most of the day, my time with the boys probably does not even come to an hour in a day. When I'm at work from 9 to 7 as I was today, my only realistic time with them is in the early hours of the morning - whatever time they are awake from 5 to 8 am. And let's be honest - those are hours where I am desperate for just a little more sleep. Plus, that's time I am splitting three ways between the boys and Lola. I try to limit the number of days that I have where I am out of the house that early and home so late, but it happens sometimes. I suppose I should not be complaining given they are sleeping like champs between the hours of approximately 7 to 8 pm and 4 to 5 am, but...I am sad. I miss them.
Lola is as precious as ever, however, and Al and Teo, only 5 days away from hitting 6 months, are unbelievably sweet and adorable. Without my parents around, we no longer have anyone diligently and lovingly taking pictures and videos of the kids every day. This may be the last good picture post in a long time, alas.
I think their teeth will be popping out soon - they are teething something fierce and all they want is to chew on stuff! Toys, teething rings, stuffed rabbit ears, my fingers!
This is probably my favorite photo from that day, though so many were funny and good, it's hard to say.
There is so much genuine joy and happiness and gurgling and fat cheeks and arms and thighs.
When Michael took Lola to play in the soft play area, I had some quality time sitting with my little man by the pool as he observed the older kids play, and then walking by the water as he watched the kayakers and snorkelers out in the ocean. Teo was so observant and it just felt like he was trying to absorb every detail. No wonder he was exhausted on his way home!
No comments:
Post a Comment