Girlfriends

I have had a recent run of good interactions with girlfriends, and while I don't have pictures commemorating all of these moments both large and small, I wanted to note in particular how important it has been this year in particular for me to have close friends that I can connect to, commiserate with, and have fun hanging out with, despite quarantine/social-distancing protocols and our busy lives.

Like many things in life that seem to sneak up on you over time without your even realizing it, this particular friendship is going on seven years now... I cannot believe it.  We were all unmarried and now we have been together through a lot of birthdays, hen do's, engagements, weddings, and, (soon to be) seven kids.  

They were the first group of people I hung out with when I went out for the first time after the boys were born this year, and the first group of people I met up with when the third wave of Covid passed Hong Kong.  After the year we've had,we made a pact to hang out together once every month, situations permitting, to get dinner, get drinks, and just generally shoot the ****, the only prerequisite being that we would try our best to find al fresco spots only.  But it's all done in a very great and chill way.  It is friendship in its most generous and beneficial form.  It's so special and we all walk away from dinner each time feeling so blessed.  I also forget how beautiful the patio of Duddell's is, and these pictures show why it's such a lovely oasis in a cramped city of millions, making its overpriced dim sum worth it.

I started going to a post-natal pilates class on Friday mornings even though it is inconvenient and not always manageable, but I am consciously making the effort because I love the sense of community that I have with these post-partum mamas all struggling through all the same exercises.  It's a great bonding experience as we laugh at each other and ourselves, sometimes staring at the teacher in disbelief ("I'm sorry, you want me to connect the pelvic floor on the exhale and simultaneously keep my ribs tucked but my shoulders relaxed and do what else?!") and it's good for us to boot.   

I've also really tapped into the MoMs (mothers of multiples) groups in Hong Kong.  As I chuckled with a dad of twins who came to my playgroup this morning, "parents of twins have an immediate bond" because you just instantly understand the amount of work and exhaustion that goes into parenting two babies at the same time, and it gives you perspective that parents who only ever had to deal with one screaming baby at time can kind of appreciate, but never really truly understand...  It's a special club that not everyone elects to be in, but once you're in you can wear that membership like a badge of honor.  It's also really nice to receive, but also be able to share, tips and advice.  Sometimes, more than anything, it's just knowing that there is a sympathetic ear out there from someone who knows exactly how stressful it can be to always feel like you are at least three or four hands short - but then also knows exactly how blissful and blessed you feel watching all the happy moments unfold, squared!

That's not to say that I'm all about the mommy groups.  I do take a lot of care not to just natter on about my children, particularly at work and with my friends who do not have children.  I don't mind talking about them a little bit, of course, especially when asked, as they are a huge part of my life now, but I usually refrain from showing pictures or gushing about their latest developments, very conscious of the fact that while it is of huge import to me, most people could care less!  No, I guess I save that stuff for the blog instead!  In this I am also grateful that I have managed to hang on to a few near and dear girl friends who, while they do not have children, are still very much present in my life and have not let the parental divide break up our friendship.  It's a blessing.