But before I left for the US, in early November, we got a fish tank. I have been thinking about getting the kids pet fish for a while, but didn't want to act on it until we had space and the boys were old enough to get it and appreciate it. But now that we have one, it turns out I'm the fish pet owning maniac!
On the first couple of days of fish ownership, we lost the dearly beloved Sky Moonlight (Al named his fish Moonlight, Sunlight and Sky Moonlight) followed in quick succession by a purple fish of Lola's named Draculara and an orange cream colored fish of Teo's named Orange Vanilla.
Sky Moonlight's unfortunate departure led to an intermittent forty minute crying jag from Lola, as she mourned the departure of her "most" dearly beloved fish. When I pointed out that that particular one was really Al's fish, she just wailed harder.
Her questions betrayed a deep philosophical understanding and sense of loss, as she grieved over how short his life was and how he didn't have time to truly enjoy the benefits of his new home, and expressed regret that we didn't catch his ailment early enough to cure him. And every time she would almost get close to feeling better and achieving closure, a new realization, like the fact that she would never, ever, get to see him again, would set her off again in fresh waves of sobbing.
While Sky Moonlight's passing was a tiny blip in the scheme of things, watching her mark and measure her grief, and process the brutality of the finality of death, felt oddly like a sacred parenting privilege, deserving of love, comfort, reverence and patience.
But this also drove my urgent need to quickly find and replace the latter two fish before the kids discovered the difference...
I've since gone back to the pet store once more to buy 20 more fish, so that we now have 27 fish, crabs (3) and snails (3), although I believe we have since lost a few more, including a crab. I have also ordered a water heater, air pump, water testing straps, long tweezers for picking out debris...and watched about 5 or 15 youtube videos about cleaning, maintaining, and protecting your fish.
I love it though, I often find myself hunkering down in front of the tank and observing the ecosystem activity mindlessly. It takes me out of the moment and forces me to slow down.
The kids love squeezing in front of the tank to check on the progress of the fish and feed them.
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