Continuing in my slew of much-delayed catch up posts, this one is a mega-family focused one, covering my grandma's 90th birthday celebration and my sister's beautiful wedding!
My nai nai, my dad's mother, is turning 90 in September, but because it's so rare for the entire family to be together from Hong Kong and Taiwan, my uncle decided to throw her a big party at his house with a chef to cater the whole occasion. My aunts and uncles and cousins and all their respective spouses and girlfriends showed up. My uncle lives in Syosset and ended up picking Saturday, the 13th for the big event, in order to accommodate travel and work schedules. It worked perfectly for me as I was coming back from the Hamptons and hopped off of the Jitney at the Islip airport spot, where my dad kindly picked me up.
My nai nai lost her short term memory generally about the time that I moved to Hong Kong, and it has slowly been getting worse and worse. She still remembers me, although recently she has had a few moments of confusion due to not seeing me often. Michael exists outside the realm of her short term memory, as does Lola, so every time she sees them she asks who they are. Her recall time has shortened such that sometimes she will ask me not 5 or 10 seconds after she just asked me the question. Her long term memory is still largely intact, though I suspect that bits and pieces of that may be going as well. It is one of those sad and inevitable signs of old age, though she seems relatively content with her situation. She is aware that she doesn't retain new memories or knowledge anymore, but I really do not see any sign of temper or frustration on her part. Perhaps any angst or regret that she feels in the moment is all too quickly wrapped up and washed away. Perhaps I am just not around enough to witness it.
However, nai nai is still a feisty woman. Probably barely measuring at 4 feet 10 now, she still embodies a lot of fire and spirit - as evidenced by the fact that my aunt hired a belly dancer for the party, and nai nai got up to shake her booty a few times! Oh yes, see how I just glossed over that really quickly? Family.... Everyone tried to persuade my aunt that hiring a belly dancer was not necessary (or relevant? appropriate?) for my 90 year old grandmother, but she could not be swayed. A belly dancer was the big reveal after the multi-course (all day) eating feast and just before the cake and the traditional "shou tao" (long life peaches, a dessert that is just a red bean bun in the shape of a peach).
This belly dancer was nowhere as good as the belly dancer that showed up for my grandfather's birthday party nearly 20 years ago (yep....), but she still put on a good show. My aunt went up to dance multiple times. My nai nai laughed and twisted center stage a few times. My sister and I were cajoled/convinced to go up and do a twirl, and stuff some bills into the belly dancer's dress. My mom went up and did a great rendition, showing off all of her zumba moves. One of my cousins fled the scene in horror with a huge glass of wine as soon as he could. Michael had left with Lola way earlier, as soon as he heard that there was a belly dancer on the program. You know, we all deal in different ways.
The party itself, other than the "main attraction," was actually shockingly fun. The food was very good, with lobster salad, crabs served a few different ways, lamb chops, sea urchin, and an amazing soup with Taiwanese "slippery" noddles that I probably drank four bowls of.
The cousins gathered around and played Monopoly deal (probably my favorite game currently, it is so fast and dynamic and great with a crowd), then moved on to mahjong after the adults all went home. We had to teach my cousin's wife how to play, but she picked up quickly. Because we had extra people who weren't playing mahjong, somehow the idea of beer pong got tossed out as an option. Surprisingly (or, actually, not at all surprisingly?) my cousin had a regulation beer pong table and plenty of red solo cups as well as balls. The only major change from all of our respective college days' was the change from beer to water. We had to drive and work the next day!
Probably the best part of the night was watching the cousins try to outdo each other in beer pong. Amanda and Ernie matched off first. Then David played Ernie. Then Victor played David. Then Ernie played Victor. Then David's girlfriend (who was meeting all of the family members for the first time ever, by the way... can you imagine!!) came out like a shark and beat David and Ernie! She ended up winning 4 bottles of sake. I howled with laughter and could only shake my head in bemusement. David said it right when he said to her with wide eyes, "You're scary." Don't mess with this girl!
It was also at this party that we "commissioned" Ernie to help Michael build his computer. Michael has been frustrated and struggling with his off-the-shelf Dell desktop for a while now. It is very slow and frankly completely unable to keep up with his work demands. When I got to NY and saw Joe's (Amanda's husband's) self-built computer, I was determined that Michael should try also to have a custom built machine. Gamers do it all the time - why can't lawyers who need more memory, processing power, and less bloatware? Ernie has been building his own computers for years now, and he had a lot of knowledge and skill to impart. My fantasies of actually putting together my own computer fell by the wayside given how crazy our schedule was in the US, but I figured I should just harness my cousin's expertise. I read a bunch of articles and tutorials, got a super quick dummy's guide to computer parts, purchased the parts from the site that helps you piece together the parts to buy to ensure they're all compatible, and then Ernie put it together for us in one day. Of course we paid him for his time and effort. In return, we got a custom desktop! Admittedly, it is HUGE and not what I was expecting for portability, but what can you do. I really hope it works well for Michael.
Moving on to the biggest event of all, and the reason that we were all in the US in the first place - my sister's wedding! Amanda got married on Saturday the 20th, and while the lead-up to it was quite hectic for all of us on all fronts, it all turned out beautifully. Joe's family flew en masse from Taiwan and they spent the week touring Washington D.C. and Boston before finally alighting in NY for the big event. Amanda spent a lot of her time traveling with them.
On the big day, I went to the hotel early to get ready with Amanda and Joe's sister, Quinney. Amanda chose the same makeup artist and hairstylist that I used for mine - she is really amazing and I know lots of women who have used her for their big day (especially Asian women, because as a talented Japanese lady she really understands the facial contours and hair textures). It was fun to get those final moments in the morning to relax among just the three of us, despite the build-up of wedding hubbub (florists calling, last-minute shoe swapping, food and coffee deliveries to the room). When the photographers and videographers showed up, that's when everything really got going. I loved my sister's dress, a Reem Acra with delicate beading and a beautiful back.
Amanda and Joe did a tea ceremony honoring the elders from both sides of the family (grandparents, parents, aunts and uncles) and lots of pictures were taken, followed by the ceremony and then a huge banquet-style multi-course dinner. Climate change is here to wreak havoc with our plans, and as it turned
out that week in NYC was one of immense heat. As unprecedented heat
waves swept Europe, NY hit highs of nearly 100 degrees. With the
humidity and the bright sunshine it was intense! We were all really
worried about the ceremony because it was outdoors, albeit at 6 pm.
However the ceremony was very brief and people managed to hold it
together (no one fainted) with shades, fans and ice water.
Lola was the flower girl and she was SO cute in her dress, gold shoes, and with her hair braided and twined with some gold leaf ribbon. She had a little basket full of dried flower petals that she was reluctant to part with, somewhat defeating the point of it all - but she was undeniably cute and charmed the audience. We were pretty worried she was not going to be able to make it down the aisle - certainly not by herself, and likely not with anyone except her parents. She started out really well, walking hand in hand with me, but the aisle was too long and by the time she got to the actual runner, she refused to keep going. We ended up going down together, Michael me and Lola, and we all threw some flower petals at some (random) points.
The rest of the wedding proceeded at the fast pace you always expect on big days like that - there was a crowded and hectic cocktail hour, a first dance, cake cutting, speeches, a photo booth, lots of dancing...and lots of catching up with relatives and friends. The initial dance floor got very exciting very quickly because both grandmothers (my nai nai and po po) made it out to the dance floor and shook their booties, to everyone's delight. They are 90 and 92, respectively! It was such a great time.
Did I neglect to mention that in all the activities I outlined in my prior post, I also had to come up with a wedding speech as the matron of honor at her wedding? Oh yes, I was silently stressing about it quite a bit, because I wanted it to be a good speech, heartfelt and authentic but also not boring or lengthy. I am happy to report that, despite my anxiety about it, and aside from a super last minute jangle of nerves right as I was about to start with microphone in hand (thanks mom and dad), it really went well.
My nai nai, my dad's mother, is turning 90 in September, but because it's so rare for the entire family to be together from Hong Kong and Taiwan, my uncle decided to throw her a big party at his house with a chef to cater the whole occasion. My aunts and uncles and cousins and all their respective spouses and girlfriends showed up. My uncle lives in Syosset and ended up picking Saturday, the 13th for the big event, in order to accommodate travel and work schedules. It worked perfectly for me as I was coming back from the Hamptons and hopped off of the Jitney at the Islip airport spot, where my dad kindly picked me up.
My nai nai lost her short term memory generally about the time that I moved to Hong Kong, and it has slowly been getting worse and worse. She still remembers me, although recently she has had a few moments of confusion due to not seeing me often. Michael exists outside the realm of her short term memory, as does Lola, so every time she sees them she asks who they are. Her recall time has shortened such that sometimes she will ask me not 5 or 10 seconds after she just asked me the question. Her long term memory is still largely intact, though I suspect that bits and pieces of that may be going as well. It is one of those sad and inevitable signs of old age, though she seems relatively content with her situation. She is aware that she doesn't retain new memories or knowledge anymore, but I really do not see any sign of temper or frustration on her part. Perhaps any angst or regret that she feels in the moment is all too quickly wrapped up and washed away. Perhaps I am just not around enough to witness it.
However, nai nai is still a feisty woman. Probably barely measuring at 4 feet 10 now, she still embodies a lot of fire and spirit - as evidenced by the fact that my aunt hired a belly dancer for the party, and nai nai got up to shake her booty a few times! Oh yes, see how I just glossed over that really quickly? Family.... Everyone tried to persuade my aunt that hiring a belly dancer was not necessary (or relevant? appropriate?) for my 90 year old grandmother, but she could not be swayed. A belly dancer was the big reveal after the multi-course (all day) eating feast and just before the cake and the traditional "shou tao" (long life peaches, a dessert that is just a red bean bun in the shape of a peach).
This belly dancer was nowhere as good as the belly dancer that showed up for my grandfather's birthday party nearly 20 years ago (yep....), but she still put on a good show. My aunt went up to dance multiple times. My nai nai laughed and twisted center stage a few times. My sister and I were cajoled/convinced to go up and do a twirl, and stuff some bills into the belly dancer's dress. My mom went up and did a great rendition, showing off all of her zumba moves. One of my cousins fled the scene in horror with a huge glass of wine as soon as he could. Michael had left with Lola way earlier, as soon as he heard that there was a belly dancer on the program. You know, we all deal in different ways.
The party itself, other than the "main attraction," was actually shockingly fun. The food was very good, with lobster salad, crabs served a few different ways, lamb chops, sea urchin, and an amazing soup with Taiwanese "slippery" noddles that I probably drank four bowls of.
The cousins gathered around and played Monopoly deal (probably my favorite game currently, it is so fast and dynamic and great with a crowd), then moved on to mahjong after the adults all went home. We had to teach my cousin's wife how to play, but she picked up quickly. Because we had extra people who weren't playing mahjong, somehow the idea of beer pong got tossed out as an option. Surprisingly (or, actually, not at all surprisingly?) my cousin had a regulation beer pong table and plenty of red solo cups as well as balls. The only major change from all of our respective college days' was the change from beer to water. We had to drive and work the next day!
Probably the best part of the night was watching the cousins try to outdo each other in beer pong. Amanda and Ernie matched off first. Then David played Ernie. Then Victor played David. Then Ernie played Victor. Then David's girlfriend (who was meeting all of the family members for the first time ever, by the way... can you imagine!!) came out like a shark and beat David and Ernie! She ended up winning 4 bottles of sake. I howled with laughter and could only shake my head in bemusement. David said it right when he said to her with wide eyes, "You're scary." Don't mess with this girl!
It was also at this party that we "commissioned" Ernie to help Michael build his computer. Michael has been frustrated and struggling with his off-the-shelf Dell desktop for a while now. It is very slow and frankly completely unable to keep up with his work demands. When I got to NY and saw Joe's (Amanda's husband's) self-built computer, I was determined that Michael should try also to have a custom built machine. Gamers do it all the time - why can't lawyers who need more memory, processing power, and less bloatware? Ernie has been building his own computers for years now, and he had a lot of knowledge and skill to impart. My fantasies of actually putting together my own computer fell by the wayside given how crazy our schedule was in the US, but I figured I should just harness my cousin's expertise. I read a bunch of articles and tutorials, got a super quick dummy's guide to computer parts, purchased the parts from the site that helps you piece together the parts to buy to ensure they're all compatible, and then Ernie put it together for us in one day. Of course we paid him for his time and effort. In return, we got a custom desktop! Admittedly, it is HUGE and not what I was expecting for portability, but what can you do. I really hope it works well for Michael.
Moving on to the biggest event of all, and the reason that we were all in the US in the first place - my sister's wedding! Amanda got married on Saturday the 20th, and while the lead-up to it was quite hectic for all of us on all fronts, it all turned out beautifully. Joe's family flew en masse from Taiwan and they spent the week touring Washington D.C. and Boston before finally alighting in NY for the big event. Amanda spent a lot of her time traveling with them.
On the big day, I went to the hotel early to get ready with Amanda and Joe's sister, Quinney. Amanda chose the same makeup artist and hairstylist that I used for mine - she is really amazing and I know lots of women who have used her for their big day (especially Asian women, because as a talented Japanese lady she really understands the facial contours and hair textures). It was fun to get those final moments in the morning to relax among just the three of us, despite the build-up of wedding hubbub (florists calling, last-minute shoe swapping, food and coffee deliveries to the room). When the photographers and videographers showed up, that's when everything really got going. I loved my sister's dress, a Reem Acra with delicate beading and a beautiful back.
Lola was the flower girl and she was SO cute in her dress, gold shoes, and with her hair braided and twined with some gold leaf ribbon. She had a little basket full of dried flower petals that she was reluctant to part with, somewhat defeating the point of it all - but she was undeniably cute and charmed the audience. We were pretty worried she was not going to be able to make it down the aisle - certainly not by herself, and likely not with anyone except her parents. She started out really well, walking hand in hand with me, but the aisle was too long and by the time she got to the actual runner, she refused to keep going. We ended up going down together, Michael me and Lola, and we all threw some flower petals at some (random) points.
The rest of the wedding proceeded at the fast pace you always expect on big days like that - there was a crowded and hectic cocktail hour, a first dance, cake cutting, speeches, a photo booth, lots of dancing...and lots of catching up with relatives and friends. The initial dance floor got very exciting very quickly because both grandmothers (my nai nai and po po) made it out to the dance floor and shook their booties, to everyone's delight. They are 90 and 92, respectively! It was such a great time.
Did I neglect to mention that in all the activities I outlined in my prior post, I also had to come up with a wedding speech as the matron of honor at her wedding? Oh yes, I was silently stressing about it quite a bit, because I wanted it to be a good speech, heartfelt and authentic but also not boring or lengthy. I am happy to report that, despite my anxiety about it, and aside from a super last minute jangle of nerves right as I was about to start with microphone in hand (thanks mom and dad), it really went well.
