I have missed a lot of the detailed milestone developments and details of Al's and Teo's early toddler years, but will pause to try to capture them in a few quick renderings as they are on the cusp of graduating toddlerhood.
The boys are genuinely at their cutest and most delightful. Or maybe it's just that every phase to date has been the most delightful? Any way, not a day passes without our laughing at some quirk of theirs. With their big wide eyes, smooth silky cheeks, long lashes, and soft plump hands with the little wrinkles at their knuckles (I die) that still rush to nestle willingly and trustingly in mine, they are cuteness personified. Neither boy is chubby or excessively large, but they always fit clothes that are for kids one to two years older. It is one of the quirks of the parental sartorial universe that has mystified me for three years running now.
Al and Teo have been diaper free during the day since the fall and, barring one particularly stinky, memorable incident*， are well on their way to being fully diaper trained. Teo has always been a bit better with this, much more cognizant of his bodily functions (whether with drool or other fluids) than Al, and just this week we switched him to being diaper free at night as well.
*The incident was when the boys peed in their swiveling Ikea chairs and the urine puddled under the rubber cushion covers and we didn't discover it for days, until our entire dining room smelled like a barn and then eventually a very foul latrine, as we frantically searched and sniffed every corner of our apartment...
They generally eat well, but still adamantly refuse to eat fruits or vegetables - it takes bribes of chocolate or dessert to perhaps get one string bean or a few pieces of minced greens down each obstinate boy's gullet. Fries and chocolate ice cream probably top the most favored foods list at the moment.
Lately we have been struggling a little with their upper respiratory infections, allergies, and eczema - both Al and Teo have bodies (skin) that are much more reactive than Lola's. Teo is a mosquito magnet and gets about 3 or 4 bites to every one of Al's, though Al has a lot of discomfort and chafing and sensitivity with his skin.
We have also finally (just yesterday) started to gain some insight into their underbites, excessive drooling, speech, and eating habits, none of which taken individually was a dire problem, but taken collectively had kind of concerned us and left us unsettled. Now that we have finally met a good speech therapist who has come back with a diagnosis that makes sense and addresses all of the issues as a comprehensive whole, I feel like all the pieces of a puzzle I didn't know we had to solve has clicked into place. I really learned a lot today about the human tongue. Parents, don't underestimate the role this organ serves!
Lots of people ask us if the boys have different personalities and I understand the genesis of this question even though it strikes me as amusing. Of course they have different personalities! But admittedly, even we are sometimes taken aback by how different they are. It is a little spark of surprise every time you see two human beings who look so similar but act so differently. It's perhaps one of the greatest gifts (and there are many) of having (we think) indentical twins - a constant and joyful reminder that appearances can be deceiving! As I tell friends and family, often my first immediate sense of which boy is which is not their physical but their behavioral characteristics. I’ve found that those of our acquaintances and teachers and friends who are best able to identify them are those who note the differences in their personality first and foremost.
Teo is all about the irascible charm, and he tends to be much more sensitive and emotional about things. He is very protective of his siblings, and clearly appreciates a joke and good natured teasing. He will tell his dad to "go to your room" and when he is upset at someone, will threaten along the lines of "if you don't do [x], I will throw you off the mountain." (Where does that come from??) My favorite thing that Teo does is when he comes to me for comfort and sweetly and gently nestles his head in the crook of my neck on my shoulder while snuffling about whatever injustice has been done to him and, with his other small hand, pats my upper back, open handed, in gentle, featherlight touches. It's always hard for me to determine in these moments if I am comforting him or if he is soothing me.
Al is the embodiment of little boy, a little tank or bulldozer of intention, loud and a little rough but also full of wide eyed endearment and charm. He hurtles down slides and lets loose loud cackles of joy, finds great fun in silly games and antics. I like to think that to understand freedom and joy is to watch Al flying on his strider bike. He can be very stubborn and at such moments will, eyebrows determined and jaw set, repeatedly, insistently and exasperatingly loudly, push his agenda. Yet at the same time he can be incredibly sweet, and very sentimental. He cried when leaving his first kindergarten, when auntie Julie or Siti are on holiday, when po po went to Taiwan. He is the one that wakes up at night, and cries for companionship. Lately he has been the one who, like clockwork, stumbles to my door in the middle of the night, rubbing his eyes, either beseeching, "wo yao ni pei pei wo," which translates to "I want you to accompany me" or else, even sweeter somehow, finding me in the inky night and, wordlessly and gently linking his small fingers in mine, determinedly pulling me to his bedside.
The physical differences between the two seem more obvious to me now, though these are still relatively few and far between. Teo's voice is probably a register higher. Al has a big mole on his upper right back, by his shoulder blade, and two small moles like sesame seeds on his nose. Teo has a birthmark on his lower right abdomen and his center back, kind of a slightly darker and irregular patch of skin. They continue to have slightly different hair patterns.
Undoubtedly some of the best moments are when the boys demonstrate, in the perfectly coordinated turn of their heads or the synchronized mirroring bend of their bodies, that they are, and likely always will be, connected by the invisible strands of a deep and abiding bond that has stretched between them since their literal first moments in existence. What a privilege and delight it is for us to witness.
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